Thursday, June 3, 2010

flee baby flee

It's no secret that Jamie and I love our pastor. I think Andy Stanley is one of the greatest communicators I know of, and I consider us blessed to be able to listen to him every Sunday. His most recent series was titled Guardrails, and it was a favorite. A guardrail is a system designed to keep vehicles from straying in dangerous or off-limit areas (def. from Wikipedia). A personal guardrail is a standard of behavior that becomes a matter of conscience (def. from Andy Stanley).

Andy talked about lots of guardrails we should set up for ourselves, in terms of money, relationships, etc, based on the premise that we don't even realize the guardrails are there until we need them. Some of my favorite guardrails mentioned were from the week on sexual temptation ( topic!). I've listed guardrails below that he mentioned for married folks. (If you're interested in the singles guardrails or would like for him to elaborate, you can check out sermons here. It's the Guardrails series, and this exact sermon is Flee Baby Flee. I highly recommend it.)

1 - Don't travel alone with members of the opposite sex (car, plane, etc.)
2 - Don't eat alone with members of the opposite sex (if you do happen to get surprised - thought you were meeting a couple and only one shows up - make a phone call to your spouse letting them know)
3 - Don't hire cute members of the opposite sex because you want to help them (ugly people need help too)
4 - Don't confide in or counsel members of the opposite sex (they need help, not you)
5 - When you feel your heart or desire drifting toward a specific person, tell someone!
One thing to note - your spouse needs to know your guardrails!

I realize this is probably controversial, and I want you (all 5 of you that read this!) to know that I cast no judgement here. But, what I do know is that marriage is serious. And it's hard work. And it can fall apart without even realizing it. And then it hurts. And leaves scars. Not just you and your partner, but everyone within close proximity of you. [Sidenote - Jamie and I are great! So no need to worry I'm talking about us :)]

But I think marriage is worth it. Jamie and I created these "guardrails" long before this sermon, and they've been in effect since we got married last year. Does it make for some uncomfortable conversations (um...sorry I can't do lunch with you but the only man I do lunch with is my husband!)? Yep. Does it cause inconveniences (I really need a ride home! But I can't take you up on your offer bc you're a man)? Yep. Do some people think we're crazy? Yep. But it's worth it to us to have the world think we're crazy, if we can take any steps toward protecting our marriage. (And I'm not gonna lie, it made me feel good to hear my pastor say I'm not's just common sense!)

I could go on and on, but if you want to know more, I've already told you where to find it. I think the guardrails for single people are worth checking into as well. But for now, I'll just leave you with this -

What is that, you say? It's Snoop Dog...reading Andy Stanley's
book, How Good is Good Enough. Ha! Love it.


carolineo said...

Love this post! Miss you two.

pata814 said...

Thanks so much for posting--this is exactly what I was looking for! I just transposed those onto a sheet of paper to tape to our bathroom mirror. My husband and I go to Buckhead Church and wanted to put up these guardrails so we can see them every morning.

Again, thanks for putting the time in to do this. :)

PS The Snoop Dogg picture rocks, too.